My life is a movie, or rather, I pretend I am in a movie during my life. Sometimes it’s a spy movie, sometimes it’s a comedy and frequently when I run it’s an action adventure.
Why am I telling you these personal things that could and most likely will be used to tease me at the bar after a run? To help you of course. Let’s use my mile repeats from tonight as an example. Friend’s ask, “How come your last repeat is fastest?”
Lets get scientific for a hot second. Below are the repeats.
5:53 – 6:18 – 5:54 – 6:03 – 5:49 – 5:41
To you, these may look like mile repeats, but they are actually scenes in a movie. Let’s take a look, shall we?
Scene 1 = 5:53
Opening credits are over (my warm up) and things start to heat up. I’m headed to the office, I work for special ops and am needed there fast. What could be the trouble? Is it the Russians again?
Scene 2 = 6:18
Turns out my office is at the top of Harlem Hill, go figure. At the office I learn that it’s the Albanians. They have a bomb and are gong to blow up a landmark.
Scene 3 = 5:54
I take off, in search of the Albanians. Our sources say that they are fast, and we aren’t sure if our mark is a man or a woman. I keep moving, scanning everything in front of me, looking for something fast.
Scene 4 = 6:03
It’s getting busy down on the Southwest side of Central Park, but up ahead I see a woman moving at break neck speed. Could it be our mark? I slowly reel her in and then I notice a man trailing her. I don’t want to make my move now, too many people, but this is the guy. We pass the female and play leap frog.
Scene 5 = 5:49
Who is this guy?! Who does he work for?! He looks more Irish than Albanian and I’m puzzled. Was my intel misled? As I try and box him out he realizes what’s happening. “We’re on the same team man!,” he yells. I let him come up along side and he explains the dastardly plot. The Albanians are planning to blow up the Fred Lebow statue at Engineers Gate! “Fuck that!,” I yelled. “We can’t let that happen!” Our speed picks up and he doesn’t look good. “Go on without me, I’ll be fine, just stop the Albanians from destroying Fred’s statue!”
Scene 6 = 5:41
I have 1 Mile and no time to get to Fred to stop the bombers. As I start swinging my arms I ‘rev’ up (think… the sound that the Delorean makes when Marty breaks 88 MPH) and blast ahead.
Every movie I have ever seen from ‘Top Gun’ to ‘Bullitt’ is racing through my veins. I summoned every ounce of energy I have left to rocket forward, stopping those foolish Albanians.
I pass people looking like a crazy sweaty Irishman, panting and hanging on for dear life. I see the Fred Lebow statue in the distance and as I pass him I have beaten the Albanian to the punch and saved the day. Also, that was my best mile split, U.S.A. wins and I win. ‘Win win’ I believe they say?
So… I encourage everyone to live your run in a movie, and in the last scene kill it!
The Albanians used in this story were fictional. Christopher Baker holds no bias towards Albania, Albanians or Captain Lou Albano.